My client's often ask me about me, and though I'll disclose through story after story... what often surprises me is their surprise or rather relief.. in learning that I make mistakes.. that I feel depressed some days... that I feel angry... that some days I don't 'feel' like getting out of bed... that I struggle... that sometimes I just feel crazy... some days I just feel like everything is against me... but wait...didja catch that? The key word here is 'feel' and though I 'feel' like that - it doesn't mean I AM that.... all it means is I'm human.... and so are they... we all have so much in common with a million different ways of expressing our uniqueness or sameness (you choose)
I'm not different than them... and I'm not different than YOU...and nor are you from ME but something appears or feels different in their time with me.... maybe it's because I've learned how to sit in my own pain which allows me to sit in theirs... maybe it's because I've learned that judgment does nothing but separate and so they feel the freedom to share anything knowing they won't be judged... maybe it's because I've given myself compassion and acceptance that they too feel compassion and acceptance from me... maybe it's because I believe that we are all ONE... maybe it's because I've accepted who I am and am comfortable in my skin.. but the truth is... I'm human... and the magiK I feel and live ... is because I've learned and am learning (always in a state of evolving) to go through the pain... to trust myself... to believe in ME... and to know that I know that I know that everything I need is already inside of me... EVERYTHING! Maybe it's that I've fallen in love with the process... or maybe it's that I find the seeking is the journey... maybe it's because I've realized there is no there - only HERE... maybe it's because I've felt judged, misunderstood, neglected, abused, invisible, not good enough, betrayed - and yet I've found the beauty rise from the ash in each of these. Maybe it's because I finally learned to love and see me... and accept that this life is messy... and oh so beautiful... sometimes even more so because of the mess :)
so seeing life through my lens.....
I like questions. I like discovering. I like connecting. I like being connected. I like knowing and I like the unknown. I like to travel. I like to explore. I like to play. I like to be intense. I like to look beneath what's seen...I like colors. I believe life is colorful when I choose to truly see. I believe in magiK - the kind that brings aliveness to my world. I like feeling -I like feeling even when I don't feel happy. I believe everything is my teacher. I believe my greatest teachers have come out of my pain. I like living the paradox...
things I dislike or make me sad::::: I dislike long lines... having to deal with an automated system for any reason on the phone.... canceled flights.... stepping in gum... sticky things on my fingers... (unless it's glue and then get to pick it off)... rudeness ... setting the clock back for daylight savings... misunderstandings... closed minds----> (and I feel sad about this)... being so far away from my family... power trips... rushed dinners... knowing someone is stuck in their fears ----> (this makes me feel sad too)... having to stop for gas... being cut off when driving... oooooh oooh or when I wait for the 'perfect' parking spot and then someone snags right in front of me - bah! I mean.. really?!? --ha!
and in the 'more' I can tell you this:::::: I'm left handed and love to create anytime and chance I get in whatever form that may take. Both my parents were from England so that meant growing up I spent my summer's in England - I had an English accent until I was 5 and yet somehow I let that fade into an American blended accent - which really means...no accent. My friends say I'm intense - and I am. I think it's because I prefer authenticity and realness and depth over the surface and mindless talk. I love fall colors and leaves changing - what I miss most about the East Coast, but I don't miss the cold one bit. I like rainy days only when they're surrounded by days of sun and one of my favorite things is getting all curled up in blankets, drinking tea, watching movies, while I hear the rain fall outside....but I'd pick a day outside over any day inside...I love being in nature and getting lost or rather being present with what's in front of me. I like the light as much as the dark and find my creativity comes from playing with the contrast between the two. I like shadows from light and believe in the integration of my light and shadow self. I love art and expression especially when it comes from the soul. I don't tend to follow the 'typical' path and it appears I make a habit of creating my own way. I pursue things even more when I'm told it can't happen or it seems impossible and usually find a way to make the supposed impossible come into being. I've traveled around the world and don't want to stop. I've been told most my life that I'm an old soul and believe it to be true. I like the little things and you'd find that everything I have in my room comes with a story. I'm sentimental and my memory is ridiculous - both a gift and a curse at times. Both my parents were/are geniuses - aka Scientists...my father was a microbiologist and my mom a biochemist. It skipped both my sister and I...and my subjects became people as I have always found myself fascinated and intrigued by people.. by their fears... by the way someone talks...walks.. responds...reacts... expresses ONESELF...we are such unique creatures yes sometimes have fallen to conformity... I know I do at times.. even though I like to think I'm a non conformist. I don't like being in crowds and prefer one on one or smaller groups for connection...but put me in a crowd and let me watch and I am a happy happy girl. I love to love and feel my love is deep simply because I've felt pain and know loss.
I share all this knowing we are one in the same.. and this is simply my expression of ME - What's your expression of YOU?
May you enjoy the discovery of Seeing ~ YOU
And may you have the courage to express authentic YOU!
love love love
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